My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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