i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
