Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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