So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
third nipple confirmed
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
