I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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