so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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