I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
