Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
