i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
