I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
