Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
