We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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