Pappa wants mamma naked
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
