Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
