How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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