Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
