Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
