Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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