Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
