I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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