Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
She's the barista slut.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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