Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
