i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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