The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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