she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
