i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
So apparently I’m into choking now
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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