Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I had to cum in my sink.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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