How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
wakey wakey hands off snakey
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
