good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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