So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
My penis needs a shock collar
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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