I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
