I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
