porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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