I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I'm passing your future prison.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
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