Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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