is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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