Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
