Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
