How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
