Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
