Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
