I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize
