Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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