I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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