The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
