i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
