Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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