Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize