If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
