dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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