every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
